If giraffes lived in the US
© Thomas Mangold
What is Next Nature?
With our attempts to cultivate nature, humankind causes the rising of a next nature, which is wild and unpredictable as ever. Wild systems, genetic surprises, autonomous machinery and splendidly beautiful black flowers. Nature changes along with us.
Discussion
hahaaaaa.
THEY DO LIVE IN THE USA, BUT I DONT REMEMBER SEEING ANY LOOKING LIKE THAT, MAYBE YOUR IMAGINATION IS RUNNING AWAY ON YOU A LITTLE TO MUCH.
This is so true! Schmitz just doesn’t get it. We’re the land of over-consumption. It’s a point that Schmitzee missed. Come on, people! it’s time we stopped to think about our purchases and our habits. “Do I really need that?” Or, we can remain bloated giraffes with a bunch of, well, giraffe crap.
looks like fast foods have a bad impact on giraffes
I think Renner got it wrong too, its just making fun of obesity in the U.S. There are a lot of fat people in the US.
Just another jealous non-American. You wouldn’t even have a computer to post your bigotry if it weren’t for Americans, nor an Internet to post on. In all probability, without American’s, you’d probably be goose-stepping under a swastika or wearing Japanese pajamas saluting the Rising Sun.
First id like to say im from america. Second, this pic is funny as shit and pretty accurate. There are too many fat fucks in this country
I’m an American and I too think this piece is very accurate. There is so much obesity around me it’s disgusting, and the same goes for over-consumption. Everyone gets more that they will ever need and waste more than half of it.
HELP HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK.
LOL! Too funny.
Troy here must be a fat ass since he took it so much to heart.
I’m really starting get to tired of seeing so much anti-american crap on the internet.
YOU ARE ALL WRONG AND STUPID!!
FUCK FAT ANIMALS.
KILL THEM ALL SO I CAN EAT THEM.
THIS FAT GIRAFFE SHOULD BE SHOT IN THE FACE.
IT IS GOING TO MAKE ME FUCKIN PUKE.
My cat is fat. ._.
Fuck you assholes,
so some americans are fat, not all of us are, insult american and we’ll come nuke your fucking country you fuckin twat stick mother fucking dick sucking whores
LOL OMG WTF. TIHS IS SOOOOOO FNUUNNNYY!!! LMAO
Adam,
A really meaningful statement by an obviously uneducated imbecile who doesn’t appreciate one iota of subtle humor.
You do the United States of America a grave disservice with such immature, ignorant outbursts.
Grow up and get a life, you sad little boy…
People like you embarrass me, and my kind. We do not stand for what you espouse.
De Oppresso Liber!
Troy I hate to burst your arrogant American bubble, but Charles Babbage invented the computer and Tim Berners-Lee invented the world wide web, both of them are English.
stop getting so god damn insulted! it’s a joke! don’t get it? go away.
It’s people like you that give America a bad name. “We’ll nuke your country for saying i’m fat!”
well, my friend, you are a fat pig. stop being inlove with yourself!
Nope James, Hate to burst Your arrogant British bubble but Konrad Zuse of Germany invented the computer and the US’ ARPA invented the internet. T
KOMPRESSOR DESTROY GIRAFFE. KOMPRESSOR TAKE HIS GLOWSTICK. ROBOTS DESTROY THE EARTH. FAT GIRAFFE HACK INTERNET COMPUTER AND EXPLODE. KOMPRESSOR NUKE EARTH AND HIT YOU IN THE FACE.
Pro-Tip: Austrailia is now the world’s fattest country.
What’s with the American over-pride here? You do realise you’re in essence all British mixed with native Africans. Charles Babbage invented the computer concept, meaning without that there would be no computer. Surely someone else may have thought of it, but Babbage was first. He was English. An Englishman also invented the WWW. True, the USSR created the ARPA, but that’s not the internet we use now. So what you’re seeing in front of you and the computer you’re seeing it on is thanks to England, not America. But even if America did create it, Americans are decended from Britons. It’s not that difficult to learn or look up facts before presenting them as evidence…
Back to the subject, luckily for America they’ve lost the title of world’s fattest nation. ‘Only’ 25% of Americans are obese. Australia is now the world’s fattest nation.
Let me just say that, being a giraffe, I’m OUTRAGED by this whole thread. Less than 2% of all giraffes are obese, and none are morbidly obese as portrayed in the picture. I am so offended I don’t even know where to begin… You all need to get your facts straight and stop using giraffes to illustrate your stupid human political views. How would you feel if I made a cartoon about humans eating all the leaves at the tops of our trees? You wouldn’t like it either. And since we originally invented the internet and Al Gore, so that makes both of them African African (2x for emphasis), not British or Korean like you all claim. STOP USING US GIRAFFES AS SCAPEGOATS!! WE ARE NOT GOATS!!
I hate to burst your bubble, Actually, but there is not one iota of “British” in my heritage… My heritage is German / Prussian. And, in fact, if even the Britts trace their heritage back far enough, there aren’t original natives of said dreary Isle. We’re all immigrants from somewhere. To be honest, the concept of National pride to the point of anger and disrespect, no matter how politely put, is rediculous and to be honest, childish. Hurray, Brittain, Hurray, America, Hurray everyone else… Happy? Now go back to your tinker toys and maybe think of a nap, because at the end of the day (no matter how un-evolved some of you seem) we are people. Each and every one of us is a human being. Leave it at that. Socio-economic standings aside, there are obese individuals in pretty much every country in the world. Don’t like it? Exercise.
Fat yank assholes can’t take a joke
The problem isn’t that its anti-american, just that it’s a cheap shot. Like putting a hitler mustache on a kitten and saying “If kittens lived in germany” or gravy stained ties and thick ankles on rhino and saying “If rhinos lived in England” or a bottle of booze and a belt to beat his wife next to a kangaroo and saying “if kangaroos lived in Australia” Oh, wait…
It’s not anti-American – it’s satire and it’s spot on. We do over consume, we do over eat. I remember a time when there was THE fat kid in y our class, now it’s who are the kids that aren’t fat. Sure, we’re not the only ones guilty of such over indulgence, but we’re up there.
It seems like it’s more a stab at american fatness than americans in general. Therefore, if you’re not fat but american, you should not be complaining. However, if you are fat AND american, well then you’re a fat fucking giraffe and should consider getting un-fat. P.S. good job guys- keep up the ad hominems!
people will find anything to argue about
i think it’s funny and true
especially when you walk in to a grocery store, and old people with broken legs are waiting for those wheelchair karts cuz the fat people took them so they didn’t have to walk around the store and get some EXERCISE
damn fat yank giraffes!!
LOL@ the nuke your ass comment, your pathetic!
Interesting photoshop… It wasn’t done all that well. On the whole “statement” issue, the most recent pollings have shown AUSTRALIA to be the most obese country. On top of the fact that the United States isn’t the most obese, the studies showing that it is are inherently flawed and slanted to make it seem that way. They tend to measure obesity as “30 lbs. over the ideal body weight for a height.” which leaves almost every bodybuilder or large framed person as obese. When looking at body fat index, the United States is still towards the top of the list, but generally not considered the most obese.
Great pic.. But its kinda funny to see all the stats pop up.. AUSTRALIA as the most obese country.. Body fat indexes poping up.. hehe.. Oh and dont forget the insults.. of course only americans do that. Take it easy… it’s just a joke… Some good photoshop if you ask me, keep up the good work
So funny! why do you guys take it so serious? Americans make fun of British people all the time too. I’m an American but I have lived in Europe and we do eat alot more! our portions are huge and thus we tend to get bigger. there are far more fat people here than there. But really you just need to lighten up! Its a funny joke!
“Just another jealous non-American. You wouldn’t even have a computer to post your bigotry if it weren’t for Americans, nor an Internet to post on. In all probability, without American’s, you’d probably be goose-stepping under a swastika or wearing Japanese pajamas saluting the Rising Sun.”
You obviously dont have your history right
America didn’t join till near the END of the war.
And even then, you didn’t really do shit to end the war.
You dropped an atom bomb on Japan.
Woo-fucking-hoo.
Seriously.
The only reason America joined is cause you got pissed off that Germany sunk a ship with your damn people on it.
Get over yourself.
That is joookkess!!!
but why do people care so much? its just a little bit of fun.
Troy guy, you need to sort yourself out. You talk about people being bigoted, when the thing you say after that..what was it? “without American’s, you’d probably be goose-stepping under a swastika or wearing Japanese pajamas saluting the Rising Sun” This is the most arrogant, ridiculous thing i have ever heard.. we could easily survive without you! XP
This is a hilarious picture, and I believe it was Troy up there who said something like if it werent for america, there would be no internet or computers. That almost made me laugh more than the picture.
I really don’t understand. I’m an American and while I don’t appreciate how people sometimes badmouth America, I really don’t understand the need to argue about such meaningless crap. For those of you who are fanatic patriots: FACE IT, there are a lot of fat people in America. I personlly find this ti be pretty funny as that is what happend when you eat too much fast food. And for those of you who just like to get online and badmouth other people because you can do it without getting the shit beaten out of you (more or less), your countries aren’t perfect either. I don;t really care who invented the computer, many people over time have contributed to the development of the computer whether they be American, German, or fucking Mongolian. Who cares that Charles Babbage invented the first computer. By today’s standards it most likely sucks. Why don’t we use the internet for what it was intended rather than making all of our countries look bad by getting online and threatening to nuke people and acting like fucking idiots.
wow im bad at making sentences
and while i’m at it:
Arianne said:
“America didn’t join till near the END of the war.
And even then, you didn’t really do shit to end the war.
You dropped an atom bomb on Japan.
Woo-fucking-hoo.
Seriously.
The only reason America joined is cause you got pissed off that Germany sunk a ship with your damn people on it.
Get over yourself.”
YOU ARE A SHITHEAD. First of all the ship you’re talking about, that was WW1. The atom bomb was WW2. If yo’re even going to attempt to insult people, at least make yourself look better than the one whom you are insulting. And have you ever heard of D-Day or the battle of Midway. If not…. look them up. If you can even read that is.
this string of responses to the picture is more amusing than the picture
I thought the Russians won the war, no?
Battle of Stalingrad and starving the freezing Nazis in women’s jackets in a seige and all that, no?
Ah well. What I do know is that giraffes had limited involvement in the war. Really a minimal effort. Though they saw through the whole age of appeasement thing right away.
I’m in love with Mr.Giraffe.
Mr. Giraffe, you sir (or whatever the proper pronoun for animals is) are the reason I am on teh internetz. Thank you for making my day! Nice pic too, although the statement is a little obtuse
The plethora of comments on this photo are far funnier than the photo itself.
Know what’s hilarious? Making fun of obesity. After doing so, I feel so nice! I should do it more often!
Saw the pic (funny!), knew there would be heated babble below and started scrolling…
You can see by my placement in the comment list how much I read before I was able to post this.
@ Michael J Schmitz, Troy, Adam and the other flag-wavin’, 4×4 drivin’, rootin’-tootin’-est rednecks that bothered to post: sure, America is a superpower and has the ability to inflict great damage to other nations. We are the only country who has launched a nuclear attack on another country, we have contributed a large amount of the world’s technology, we are the richest, and we are the fattest.
But look at the other side. America makes up something like 5% of the world’s population (I didn’t bother to look up the statistic, so no flames).
That means that we are exactly like the one kid out of 20 in your elementary school class who beat up on other kids, threatened them, and were basically fucking jerks because that kid thought he was not to be fucked with.
In my elementary school class, 6 kids kicked the shit out of that one kid because he was fat, out of shape, over confident, and just plain didn’t see it coming.
We’re next.
*Insert snide political rant here*
Hahah, quality…
I was born and raised in America and I find that picture hilarious!